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Safe in the subterranean bosom of the belly of the caves of the Switchblade Mountains, our heroes awake from a well deserved rest, and yet...temptation slinks between the stalagfrights and the wonder-seeking talking dogs of these too-quiet tunnels. Why leave at all, why not stay, when everything you ever thought you wanted can be yours? Also, Stirfry makes sushi!? What a character!


Summary[]

The party survives their fall out of Ruleshaven and lands safely thanks to Stirfry organizing his new rat subjects into forming a rope and cushioning their fall. The party takes some much-needed rest in an alcove before they regroup to try and find their way home. The party has several side conversations: Hot Roddy looks to Frederick for advice on being an uncle. Bellow discovered that Cordelia was studying journalism in college and begs that what he's said be off the record. Albee talks to Stirfry and confides that she wants to work with him to kill Virginia if she continues to hunt them. Stirfry firmly insists that it's fine to kill another for their own protection, trying to convince her to practice by killing his rats. She ultimately refuses and Stirfry prepares some rat sushi for them instead. Cordelia makes contact with Cheddar through Hot Roddy, both happy to see that the other is alright. Cordelia shares her concerns about her latest and most destructive spell, but Cheddar appears unaware of its origins. Albee begins to read the note Bellow gave her, but she reads that it is a list of possible names for her sword. She get frustrated and throws it away.

The party stumbles upon Jerry, a dog wearing a pair of sneakers wandering the caves. Bellow and Cordelia speak to him and discover that he has been wandering the tunnels for years searching for The Room of Wonders, a place where all of your wishes are granted. He decides that he has mixed feelings on the party so he wanders off on his usual path by going against the flow of the water.

Realizing that Jerry never found the room, Bellow follows the flow of the water. It leads to an organic vault where inside, a field of grass with distinct backyard vibes is revealed. The party happily enters and discover it to be true, wishing for food and friends. They realize that the wishes are bound within the room and cannot answer all their needs as they are welcomed by Pope Bonoducci the Infinitieth, a centaur in holy garb. He explains that a piece of God's brain was stolen and used in this room to use a fraction of his power, creating anything they wish within its reach until it wakes. The party attemps to satisfy their needs, with Stirfry summoning Splish-Splash, Bellow creating a map with the location of his parents, and Frederick regaining his mortal body, but they slowly realize that these are all either illusions or fleeting pleasures.

They finally agree to leave. Pope Bonoducci agrees to turn off the God brain long enough to let them see the real room; an empty cavern apart from a large jar of brain matter hooked up to a chained up halfling. Cordelia asks to restore the illusion long enough to conjure Count Ivan. She gives him a hug and he advises her on directions to get them out of the tunnels. The group leaves as Hot Roddy splits off from them, assuring them that he can distract the Witch Hunters for them. The party sets off for Brian Doyle Falls, since Bellow's illusory map told him they would be at his hometown.

Bellow asks if Albee read his note, and she admits to not reading the list of weapon names since she already chose one. She gladly lets Bellow explain his ideas, and in a post-outro scene, Bellow adds that he had written about his feelings after the list, getting Albee to scream.

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